Q: Dear Todd, I feel extremely unsettled when I sense that I am being deliberately excluded. How do I find the source of why this unsettles me so much?

TODD ANSWERS: The source is not in the situation but in the mind. It is caused solely by mental activity. Like an improv troupe, our mind throws out a suggestion and then we create a whole show around it.

Instead of searching the depths of these unpleasant thoughts, practice witnessing the thoughts that do pop up as if you’re flipping through radio stations. Like a radio, our mental chatter is broadcasting 24/7, but we do not have to give them our full and undivided attention as if they are important and wise.

We don’t want to lie to ourselves. That would be denying what is happening. But we don’t have to give any weight to them at all, especially if we don’t like the channel.

At our core, we are consciousness. That means we can put all of our conscious awareness on our thoughts, our surroundings, our body, or our breath. Tune into the station you want to listen to. When we just focus on our peaceful breath, peaceful thoughts naturally follow.