Q: Dear Todd, I feel extremely unsettled when I sense that I am being deliberately excluded. How do I find the source of why this unsettles me so much? TODD ANSWERS: The source is not in the situation but in the mind. It is caused solely by mental activity. Like an improv troupe, our mind throws out a suggestion and then we create a whole show around it. Instead of…
Q: Dear Todd, in my case, all my stress and chronic anxiety come from insecurities and a lack of self-worth. I'm selfish and unkind to people sometimes, but it's not because I want to be; it's because of how I feel about myself. Every moment of my life, I feel I'm not enough and am always afraid of failing. So I stress and stress, can't sleep, and end up failing.…
We all want to be liked and we crave acceptance. And yet, at times we can feel like everyone is judging us or hating us. Ironically, it’s often the people-pleasers who are most sensitive to this phenomenon. They want to be liked by everyone (which is impossible) and so when just one person is unkind, they notice. This can make it very difficult to have a peaceful life. So what…
If supermodels are insecure, if billionaires feel like failures, and if the world's greatest artists feel like imposters, how the heck are the rest of us supposed to feel worthy and good enough?! The truth is, value doesn't come from others' praise, worth doesn't come from wealth, and contentment doesn't come from achievement. If we only care about superficial things like money and looks, our lives will lack what truly…
Q: Dear Todd, When I feel the separation between us, I become angry. When I feel I am being judged, my subconscious becomes hostile and temporarily loses my normal peace & serenity. Any thoughts?Todd Answers: It can be difficult when dealing with others as two colliding realities clash. But the separateness is still only an illusion and the best and quickest way to regain serenity is to look closer and…
Someone recently asked me, "I achieved so much in my life. How not to get attached to that? I am nothing without my accomplishments."Achievements are one of the most common ways our ego gets inflated. I call it: falling for the success trap. How could the most advanced biological life form in the universe ever feel like "nothing," with or without accomplishments? How could someone living on a planet with…
From Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterWe all have a story about ourselves and our lives that plays on repeat in our mind. It may be negative, it may be positive, or it may be mixed. No matter what the story says, we tend to believe it and defend it at all cost. Even if it makes us miserable and insecure, we hold on tightly to it. It is…
Don’t all the best humans have a feeling of inadequacy when going out on a date? Ain’t that a thing? The most thoughtful people are so often too introspective and self-critical. It’s easy to get fixated on insecurities, especially because of the ubiquitous media’s idealization of what the ‘perfect’ life looks like, but it’s important to remember you are absolutely perfect as you are.Whenever you are overthinking about yourself, try…
From Path to Peace With Todd Perelmuter NewsletterWhen I was a kid, I didn’t always fit in. Growing up in Louisville, KY — a real college sports town — my artsy, peace-loving, and authority-questioning traits weren’t always welcomed. For example, in 7th grade I got suspended because on my school’s Community Service Day they made us rake the school playground. Well, I realized that this was a private school and the…
We've all got these judgmental, opinionated, critical voices in our head — relics from a time where humans lived in the wild and in constant physical danger. Today, we live in relative safety, but whether we're at the office, in traffic, or a line at the supermarket, our bodies are in an almost constant state of stress.This subtle constant stress puts our judgmental mind into overdrive. Instead of judging whether footprints…
“I thought my biggest fear was growing old and dying in prison. In truth, my biggest fear was growing old and not knowing myself.”
- Rick Smith, Albama inmate
Path to Peace - A newsletter not just for your mental health but also for your spiritual health.
