Love & Dating

How to Cope With Someone Ghosting You (Only Way That Works)

Dealing With Being GhostedWe’ve all been there. Someone texts you, you text back, and then, silence. Sometimes it takes a few hours, sometimes days, and sometimes never.Or, when dating, you might really like someone and you think, “This can really go somewhere,” but then they disappear. Sometimes you just keep waiting for that text which never arrives. You may cycle through every emotion: anger, confusion, sadness… You keep analyzing what…

Is Gay Shame or Religious Guilt Worth Sacrificing Your Love?

Q: Dear Todd, my problem is: I am someone who saw and recognized my same-sex attraction from a young age. Over time, I surrendered to such behavior and came into contact with men. I was in a relationship with a wonderful man for several years. With whom I broke up some time ago, even though I had everything that every "gay" would want. The reason why I broke up is…

Can I Be My Own Role Model?

Spirituality is a word that means something different to just about everyone. Some people think spirituality is about being kind to others at the expense of ourself. They think it means being taken advantage of, letting governments and people do anything they want, being passive, inactive, and naive. Other people think spirituality is all about selfish interests, self-love, self-care, and selfishly feeling happy despite the many problems in the world.…

How to Not Fear Rejection From a Girl

Q: Dear Todd, fear of rejection, then not feeling good enough is what holds me back from talking to more women. I feel like I’d have way more joy in my life if I just went for it, but I know how much rejection happens plus I don’t want to force things, I like the universe to guide me to the right connections. What’s your take on this? Do you…

Betrayal Trauma: How to Stop Overthinking & Let Go

When we get hurt and let down by others, the pain we feel lingers on long after the emotional event took place. These traumatic moments in our lives take up a disproportionate amount of our mental space. If we have too many of these moments in our lives, their mental real estate can consume us. It can take all our effort not to let those experiences define us and shape…

Am I Destined to Be Forever Alone & Single?

We all (well most of us anyway) want a devoted partner, close friends, and a loving family. But trying to find the right partner, make friends, and build a family can do a number on our psyche.Relationships are a minefield of rejection and disappointment, betrayal and failure. They wreak havoc on our self-esteem, make us question our lives, and they can leave us feeling completely broken.But, relationships also provide us…

Need Someone to Care About Me

Sometimes in our lives we can feel like there is nobody there to care about us. Other times, the people who are supposed to care about us are trying to take advantage of us. So what can we do when we just need a hug, when we need the love and support of the outside world, and when we find ourselves lost in loneliness. Here are two essential things that…

Have Resentment Towards Your Ex? ONLY 3 Solutions Exist

I understand how hard it can be when people don't treat us the way we would treat others. It is disappointing, disheartening, and discouraging. People are messy and relationships can be very complicated, but we enter into them because of the immense meaning and purpose they bring.To hold onto anger and resentment is to give up on people everywhere. It's a battlefield out there, but we only have 3 options.1)…

Feeling of Inadequacy When Dating?

Don’t all the best humans have a feeling of inadequacy when going out on a date? Ain’t that a thing? The most thoughtful people are so often too introspective and self-critical. It’s easy to get fixated on insecurities, especially because of the ubiquitous media’s idealization of what the ‘perfect’ life looks like, but it’s important to remember you are absolutely perfect as you are.Whenever you are overthinking about yourself, try…

Anxiety Issues Making It Hard to Date

There are a few things we can do to lower anxiety. One way is to boost our confidence. This is done through practice and self-trust, so one thing to do is to try to have a meaningful (roughly 30-second) conversation with everyone you encounter, in a way that goes just slightly deeper and more original than “How’s the weather?” Use your surroundings to connect. This all helps us get out…