When I decided to leave my job and go to the far East to discover the secrets to life’s deepest questions, it took a solid two years before I saved up enough money to go. People stopped believing me that I was going to go, and I started to feel stuck. But I stuck to the plan, and it finally happened. From my experience looking back, I wish someone told me these three things to unstuck myself:
1. People who feel stuck have lost the love for life itself.
It’s no longer satisfying to just be alive and experience this vibrant world. Now we want to live as luxuriously as the people we see on social media. We expect a perfect life. We want our messy lives airbrushed and on a straight upward trajectory. When real life happens, we resist the challenges instead of appreciating our growth. Practice remembering that there is infinite wonder in every single atom and every single moment. Practice seeing the world through this state of awe. Seek out beauty in everything and you shall find it everywhere.
2. We feel stuck when we feel we have no options.
We always have options. Every option may come with trade-offs. Some may take time and we’ll have to develop patience and acceptance through the process. But if we get creative, if we notice our insecurities, and if we remember that we are just as deserving and capable as anyone else at creating a life that fulfills us, then with confidence and positivity we’ll find the most beneficial and rewarding path forward. See where you want to go, make a plan to get there, take committed action, be nimble, be open, and be excited to take on the challenges as they come. (Somebody recently asked me what my last message would be to the world, here is what I have to say to that.)
3. At the core of any “stuck” feeling is a loss of gratitude in our lives.
Sometimes we can change our circumstances to feel unstuck, but often we’ll just become stuck in our new place because we haven’t changed our underlying mindset. Whether or not we can change our circumstances, we can always improve our inner environment. We can always further develop our gratitude for the infinite blessings we experience in every moment. Immediately, negative feelings like “stuck” and discontentment will seem insignificant under the weight of our gratitude and all the positive things we’re focusing on in our life.
Whether you’re stuck or not, let’s practice some extra mindful awareness this week. The more present we are, the less we are thinking repetitive, cyclical thoughts. The more aware of our thoughts we are, the less they can weave self-destructive tales of inadequacy and impatience. Put up a post-it note, “Goal #1 This Week: Watch Thoughts. If they’re useful and intentional, smile. If they’re useless and irrelevant, let them go… and smile.” In my latest YouTube video, I lay out a roadmap for getting unstuck from the monotony of mundanity, and how we can dive deeper into this wild and magical universe.
Much love,
Todd
PS – What typically causes that “stuck” feeling is becoming unconscious of what we’re doing and mentally switching to “autopilot.” In this state we are completely unaware of the subtleties and the nuances that make each moment different. I talk in detail on how we can break free from this mental projection that says everyday is the same, that it’s all boring, and that the monotony is going to drive me crazy, in my new book, Finding Your True Self. It’s always the mental story that causes the suffering. But we can rise above these stories and allow for this beautiful expression of life to unfold
Also, have you watched The Miracle of Death yet? This movie is made with the intention that it would bring some peace to those who are facing difficult times of loss. My deepest condolences and love.